In a humorous commentary, Aspen Times columnist Lorenzo Semple shares his scepticism towards cryptocurrencies, preferring traditional banking methods. He critiques the over-the-top lifestyle in Aspen and the fervor of crypto enthusiasts. His exploration of a local Bitcoin ATM leads to amusing encounters with locals, revealing a town full of character and mistrust of speculative investments. Ultimately, he raises questions about the legitimacy of the crypto trend, calling for a return to simplicity and tangible pleasures.
Aspen Times columnist Lorenzo Semple takes a candid stance on cryptocurrencies, expressing his confusion over their allure. He refers to himself as old-fashioned, preferring traditional banking methods like his local Alpine Bank and maxing out his 401K. Semple finds the financial landscape around him—particularly in Aspen—overwhelming with its incessant displays of wealth, leaving him rather apathetic about the whole concept of money.
In a particularly biting commentary, he questions the legitimacy and sustainability of digital currencies, likening the whole crypto situation to a second-rate scam. The massive energy consumption associated with cryptocurrencies particularly grates on him, and his sentiments toward crypto bros—like the rich young man reported to have splashed champagne at Cloud 9—are less than favourable. He humorously contrasts this with his more modest lifestyle.
People who fervently embrace cryptocurrencies can, surprisingly, be quite zealous in their advocacy, like modern-day evangelists, proclaiming imminent wealth to anyone who will listen. Semple shares a bit of his experience, suggesting conversations with such individuals often leave him scrambling to recalibrate his tolerance for nonsense. He has learned to exit these discussions cautiously to save his sanity.
Moreover, Semple confesses his inbox is inundated with dubious crypto scams that threaten him with increasingly ludicrous demands. The absurdity of these ruses adds another layer of disillusionment for him. He finds little appeal in the churn of speculative investments when there are, in his view, far more reliable options for financial growth.
One day, he finds himself intrigued by a Bitcoin ATM sign outside a gas station in Snowmass. Unsure of what he might find inside, he ventures in, only to discover that the folks lingering near the ATM are not your typical cryptocurrency enthusiasts. It felt more like an odd slice of Americana. Inside, he strikes up a conversation with the owners and learns a bit about the unique character of the local scene, revealing a rich tapestry of life untouched by the frenzy of digital currency.
After some strong black coffee, he finally checks out the Bitcoin ATM—only to find it looks just like any other cash machine. When he asks local staff about its function, their lack of knowledge was disappointingly anticlimactic. He couldn’t help but chuckle at the strange juxtaposition of a trash can next to the machine, wondering if it was nature’s way of questioning the choices made at that ATM.
In a town where wealth and risk-taking thrive, Semple’s critical tone emphasises his mistrust of the crypto craze. He raises an eyebrow at the idea that anyone out there genuinely wants to share their good fortune with complete strangers, calling to mind the age-old schemes of con men. He muses on the increasing likelihood of Aspen becoming a hotspot for cryptocurrency events, suggesting that it would not be too different from the fraudulent salesmen of yesteryears.
As he wraps up his thoughts, Semple half-jokingly requests to be notified when it’s possible to purchase a ski pass using Bitcoin, further illustrating his skepticism about the whole crypto realm.
Contacting him directly is a breeze; just drop him an email at [email protected].
After all, he muses, wouldn’t it make more sense to just convert your cash into something tangible—like a thrilling day on the slopes?
